Aspects of Reconciliation
Reconciliation cannot occur until victims move through 4 stages of grief work — defense, anger, breakdown, regression, and adaptation. One must concede the truth of themselves, the conflict situation and give some sign of this understanding for reconciliation to occur. A good relationship to oneself; others, God and nature is necessary to release the energy necessary for peace work. A second necessary attitude is belief in the equality of all people. With these beliefs, one is able to move from grief work to conflict resolution.
Reconciliation can be defined as a process in which two or more people or parties revise mainly their behavior and partially their negative thinking and feeling concerning the other to come to a new form of coexistence. I address individuals facing the direct or indirect consequences of armed conflicts although most of what is said applies to other types of conflicts such as marital or family disputes. I will not deal with reconciliation and politics, economics, military, power distribution among groups, mass convictions, and inter-religious conflicts.
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